It's killing me...

Is this a wrong step?
I:)phone

It's either u chase after me or see me leave.
Because am no longer waiting.
I:)phone

Thanks to everyone who has come to my Chalet. Sorry that I didn't Entertain your much especially Eileen, Xinhui, Jolene, Zazilah and you girls' boyfriends and Garret. But nevertheless hope u loves enjoys at least a second there.

Specailly Thanks to all my Lovely Beloved Girlfriends:
Wendy, XuanHui, BaoShan, Ivy, Daphne.
The Gift Must have Caused bomb in ur wallets (plus GohYiHui and zy) so sorry about that. I will Appreciate them more than anyone else. Thanks for being with me through these 5 years. Time really flies. Though we are at different schools now, it never affect or separate anyone of us. We must fork out time for one another and be there for each other like how we used to. I really feel fortunate to know u girlfriends.
U know I love you; Every single one of you:)

My Boys:
GohYiHui, HeeSeng, Clar, Bok, YuXiang,Duncan,Brian, JunSong,Garret.
Thank You So much for forking our ur precious time to come and celebrate my Birthday.
U guys must have alot of fun majoring on both days. Thanks for spending the night with me as well. You guys are Amazing.

My Girls:
Eileen, Xinhui, Jolene, Zazilah.
Thanks and am really sorry for not entertaining ur much. Hope that ur get to catch up with one another on that day and enjoy the time. Thanks alot for the gift as well; you girls are so sweet:)

ZADAZ!!!
THANK YOU TO ALL THR ZADAZ MEMBERS FOR THE AMAZING SURPRISES LAST NIGHT @ MUSHROOM. Thanks for staying till late to give me a surprise, Thanks for singing the Birthday songs, Thanks for the cake and Big Yellow Birthday Card wishes. You PPL are way too amazing. I feel so lucky and fortunate to know All the ZADAZ MEMBERS AND BE PART OF THIS ONE BIG FAMILY. ROCK ROLL AND LOVE ZADAZ!

Most Importantly I want to say A very BIG THANK YOU TO MY FAMILY
Thanks Grandma for coming to my Chalet and the Big HongBao. Sorry that i neglected you on that day. Bt u know i will Always love u throughout my life. Love.
Thanks dad and mom for spending more than 1k on my Birthday Celebration. Though am stubborn and rebellious at times, your still love me like no one can. Thanks for bringing me to this Beautiful yet complicated World. I will learn to stand up myself, be a better person and never disappoint ur. Love.
Thanks Sis for all the effort and time you have put in to make my Celebration a successful one. Thanks for the balloons as well; it must really have caused a Big Bomb in ur account. Thanks for being part of the Surprises at home last night. Thank You. Love.

Last But not least I want to Specially thank a person who has been there for me throughout this 3 years and 4mths. Justin.
This journey has been a tough one with lots of obstacles,struggle, rumours, tears, jealousies, anger. It's never easy but we manage to come to this point(Not BGR).
Thanks for the Sweet and Amazing Surprise which u have planned for me last night. Instead of showing my thankfulness straight, I complained ,shouted and blamed you for many flaws. Am so Sorry about that dear. Thank you for spending so much on the branded Cake; it must have caused you more than hundreds. Nevertheless Thanks Alot for forking out the time and effort to make the sweet lovely card. It's amazing. It's countless of thank you for me to say to you; all the memories are just unforgettable............Personally Time.......
All the best dear. Love.

T.H.A.N.K Y.O.U

EVERYONE:)

L.O.V.E

WHAT DATE IS IT TODAY?!
WHOSE DAY IS IT?!
WHO HAVE THE SAY TODAY?!
WHO IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL TODAY?!
HAHAH....
No celebration today:( I have a Tough Squash Training till 8.30pm plus:(( Am so nervous and scared. Sign!
My apology Babes i will upload all the photos Soon ya; I have been occupying myself with tons of work and stress recently (i have no idea why maybe GohYiHui is right for the first time)
I have too high expectation on myself.
Ok keep that aside;
I want to write a Long Thank You Post; will try to squeeze out some time for it:))
Hereby let me First give a simple but sincere Thank you for all the Wishes, Texts, Calls, Gifts, Cards etc ect...
Never ever will i Miss out:
Thank you Grandma for giving birth to my mom who makes the presence of me today.
Thank You Mom for granting me to enter into this beautiful world.
Loves.

I thought u will but u didn't. Night.

I:)phone

Thanks for showing how much u love her. It touch me.

Bt somehow it hurts.
I:)phone

Free bus

From Tanah Merah MRT

10.00
10.30
11.00
1.30
2.30
3.30
5.00
6.00
7.30
8.30
From NSRCC
10.15
11.25
1.15
3.15
3.45
4.30
5.15
7.15
8.45
9.45
10.30

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I cannot figure out what's the unhappiness or fear inside me. It's too confusing and complicated.
Love, I no longer want to be a failure who set goal for nothing. I need to hunt back my self-control and self-discipline. I swear I want to make it this time. I need ur motivation, encouragement and trust.
Keep
Me
Going

Am not Ready for sch!

Can i not go to school tomorrow? ok sorry for being such a childish kid but i just don't have the desire of going school especially My timetable for tomorrow sucks TTM! 9-11am is my lecture followed by tutorial 4-5pm!!! 4hours of break and my friends suggest catching 2 movies haha funny people:) I guess my only motivation of going to school now is seeing Tin:) , Beloved ZADAZ, lovely female classmates and shy male classmates. Oh did i mention that my CP is very strict about punctuality?! Guess i will have a hard time this year:(

Ok let have a WHATEVER ATTITUDE and recall Happy times I had yesterday:)

SENTOSA WITH ZADAZ!!!

Had 2 Matches of Captain Ball with them under the freaking HoT sun

Sweet:))

Lovely Gellene
They are so pretty and HoT RIGHT?!!!!

I need High and HoT songs now; hopefully can boast my mood

Happy Awesome 20 Birthday Sis:)

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Love u as always.

Today was a very sweet day:)) Not because of Orientation which really bored to the maxi; maybe partly it's 16 April when my sis Finally turns 20:); but mainly because Tin did something unexpected today:) super-duper sweet to the maxi:)) I shall keep this to myself*
Let's talk about school. I met up with my classmates. The guys are very shy and the girls are quite funny and easy to get along with. Nice friends i should say but if i were to talk about serious work like projects worries will take over. I shall take one step at a time then. Accept and adapt shall be my skills for this seminster.

P.S: Time will take place. Smile to ur new life man!

Sentosa with ZADAZ in 10 more hours:)
Pray everything turns out well!

I:)phone
Went Queenstown today with Tin to buy ______. I wonder did my company really make him so happy now?! Haha amazing boy. Reaching evening we separated; his lovely dad fetched him and I went shopping at Marine area followed by Tampines:) I was trying to hunt for a small poka ribbon design pencil case but all I found was poka dota:( Just for ur information, am a Ribbon Freak:)
Business Orientation in another 8.5 hrs...worry? Excited? Ok is confuse.
Adore Tin!

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Good night Tin. Thanks for the day:)

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I:)phone
Shopping with mom and Sis at Orchard Road today was good:)
I was searching and hunting for my needs&wants as my 18 Birthday gifts. I will list them down soon to make life earlier for ur ya:) haha dun worry I go for design not brand!
Sis got a Paris Hilton's wallet as her 20th Birthday gift from me and bro.
Daddy joined us for dinner in a Korean Restaurant:))



Not up to my standard but the kimchi is nice:) somehow miss the cold noodles in Gagi!
Sry but am still upset with myself for missing the Saturday outing with ZADAZ!
Though am not very close with them, there seems to be a connection among the while load of us!
Pls Pls PLS I want to go sentosa with them this coming Saturday!!!!

There's a ZADAZ OUTING later...Although i love and miss whole loads of them but am still hestiating if am joining because 1. Today is a Sunday 2. Movie is not confirmed 3. I just realise the invitation a few hours back and i have not inform my parents who aren't home!
Oh btw am using my long awaiting lappy now:)) Took it from Funan yesterday. This lappy must feel honour and proud as my grandma accompanied me to take it!
Greeks it's 6pm now:( i doubt am going...console me can???!!!!

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My grandma so cute:))
Her presence simply makes me smile.
Love her TTM!

Amendments!

Loves Pls make urself available on the 24 and/or 25. Am organising a chalet to have my advance 18 Birthday Celebration. Buffet will be served so do come with empty stomach:)

TP FOW is Awesome. The days won't be Fun without these Beyond Awesome Friends and GLs!!

I was afraid things will be dull and boring when I entered TP alone on the first day of FOW but I guess I think too much. Count myself lucky to join ZADAZ to meet these great Friends. We simply went High and Cheered our lungs out. I can't wait to see them later in TP FOC!

I can see Tin, Song as well:)) I will be like 'Boo, Surprise!' Speaking of surprise, Tin is in ZADAZ as well. Song is in ScarFO which is just beside ZADAZ:) Cool or what?!

Money Tight and I need to collect Money for Esplanade Ticket so Pls do pass me the cash AsAp if u order from me ya. Thanks for ur support!

Am picking up myself and getting back on track.

Hopefully to feel something different tomorrow.

I have a very long way to go.

Too young to die like this.

Come on Life. Bring it on.

P.s: Do i have your backup?

FUCKING HATE MYSELF!!!

Everyone is taking me for granted; everyone.

I:)phone
P.S: Thanks V